This is Antietam, sight of the bloodiest battle this country has ever seen. And yet the scene is beautiful, calming, a perfect place to sit out and have quiet time with God while watching the sun rise above the distant hills. One can't help but wonder what those soldiers were thinking about as they stood waiting for the inevitable bloodshed to come.
I don't like waiting. I'm sure there is some poetic beauty to be found in the act, but I don't see it. A week ago I was finishing up one final day of crazy college life and spending every possible minute with my friends. Now I am sitting at home, a college degree on my desk, and a whole lot of nothing to do. I'm waiting.
Of course I've applied for jobs. And I'm getting my wisdom teeth out this week (that is something to look forward to!), so I can't do much right now. But I'm on a waiting list for a job at Disney World. I'm waiting to hear back from other people. I'm waiting to see what the future will hold, and how I am to plan the next few months. I've got things I can do, but I just don't like this period of not knowing what I will do or when. I know that it will pass, that I soon will miss these days of freedom, but it's really hard to just sit and wait.
"I don't want to be in a battle. But sitting on the edge of one I cannot escape is even worse." Pippin said it well as he pondered his current situation. The impending storm is not the worst of our problems, it is the uncertainty and worry of waiting for it. How many things do we stress and worry over, that turn out to be not worth any of the time we spent on them?
I suppose that this is the time that you learn to become who you will be when the storm comes. How you act and what you think while you are waiting determines how you will react during the battle. So I guess I'll have to use this time wisely and build up my character, so when the next step comes, I will be ready. I guess waiting isn't such a bad thing...
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