While I'm Waiting

Yes, I did get lost in the woods.

The woods in the park behind my house that I have lived in for 22 years. I didn't realize they were that big.

I suppose exploring streams and getting lost in the woods is a childhood activity, but I was never a very brave child, so I must make up for it now. You're never too old to learn a new lesson. Or two.

Recipe of the Week

I think I spend a lot of time cooking. Well, baking really, but occasionally I'll make something using "real" food too. Needless to say, I spend a lot of time in the kitchen, as can be gleaned from the fact that my last three blog posts are all recipes of the week, and I've got two more ready to go! I've made some delicious desserts this week, but I decided to post a recipe you can actually eat for lunch first.

So here it is:

 Pizza Quesadillas!

Recipe of the Week

I'm so excited for all the new recipes I'm trying! I've made a bunch of things this week while my parents were out of the house and couldn't judge me; some of them were even healthy! But the more important ones that must be shared are not exactly healthy...but they ARE delicious! And which is more important? Don't answer that. Just look at this picture and drool.

Recipe of the Week

When you live at home with your parents and don't have to go to work, you have lots of time to make new recipes! So although they will not be "college dining hall" recipes, I can still make lots of food, take pictures of it, and feel like I'm doing it for a purpose.

And there is always a purpose for pancakes at midnight. Especially these.

Still Waiting

How long does it take to break a habit? 2 Weeks? Well it's been two weeks since graduation, and finally, FINALLY the sun is shining! The weather is absolutely beautiful! In fact, I am sweating. I had forgotten such warm temperatures existed. But they do.

It is so easy to forget that summer exists when the air is so cold that it hurts to walk outside; they are like two completely different worlds. But take heart in this, that summer does exist, that it will return, and that you will once again be sweating and wishing for snow. Or at least for a little bit cooler temperatures.

And now that the world is warm and I can occupy myself by walking around outside in the bright morning sunshine, I am no longer depressed about having nothing to do. In fact I relish it. I laugh at all the poor souls who must go to work and school while I wander around barefoot in the grass, trying to avoid bees. Ha! Hahahaha!

Please try not to hate me. I will soon be working at a regular job and have a reason to wake up and get dressed every morning. Or I will run out of money. One of the two.

And I am not spending all my time wandering around aimlessly in the sun. I mean, first of all, this is NY. The sun doesn't stay out that long. But the reason I have grown content in my waiting is that I started doing things. I've said this before, but it's always helpful to have a reminder, as clearly I need. When you are depressed or you don't know what to do, just do something. Nothing can happen until you start. Then you can change what you're doing, or you can figure out something else to do, but you've got to do something.

 I always have a lot of things I say I want to do, but never take action toward accomplishing them. Well, why not? So I'm writing a book. I really am. I've written out plans and character sketches and started a rough draft. And I'm learning guitar. I can actually play some songs now, and I played for so long yesterday I was forced to quit because the strings were cutting into my fingers. And I'm going to speak Spanish, if it's the last thing I do. I can, at the very least, read "Green Eggs and Ham" in Spanish, since I picked up a copy at the library yesterday.

So take heart that summer will return. And do something.

...waiting...

What thoughts must have passed through their heads, as they stood with their feet in this grassy field, their eyes taking in the serene hillside, their guns lagging off their shoulders...

This is Antietam, sight of the bloodiest battle this country has ever seen. And yet the scene is beautiful, calming, a perfect place to sit out and have quiet time with God while watching the sun rise above the distant hills. One can't help but wonder what those soldiers were thinking about as they stood waiting for the inevitable bloodshed to come.

I don't like waiting. I'm sure there is some poetic beauty to be found in the act, but I don't see it. A week ago I was finishing up one final day of crazy college life and spending every possible minute with my friends. Now I am sitting at home, a college degree on my desk, and a whole lot of nothing to do. I'm waiting.

Of course I've applied for jobs. And I'm getting my wisdom teeth out this week (that is something to look forward to!), so I can't do much right now. But I'm on a waiting list for a job at Disney World. I'm waiting to hear back from other people. I'm waiting to see what the future will hold, and how I am to plan the next few months. I've got things I can do, but I just don't like this period of not knowing what I will do or when. I know that it will pass, that I soon will miss these days of freedom, but it's really hard to just sit and wait.

"I don't want to be in a battle. But sitting on the edge of one I cannot escape is even worse." Pippin said it well as he pondered his current situation. The impending storm is not the worst of our problems, it is the uncertainty and worry of waiting for it. How many things do we stress and worry over, that turn out to be not worth any of the time we spent on them?

 I suppose that this is the time that you learn to become who you will be when the storm comes. How you act and what you think while you are waiting determines how you will react during the battle. So I guess I'll have to use this time wisely and build up my character, so when the next step comes, I will be ready. I guess waiting isn't such a bad thing...